I must first start by saying that I am not a specific religion. Most people ask me my thoughts on religion or what religion am I and the only honest response I can come up with; I am all religions. I believe in practicing you right to believe whatever you want. Do I agree with every religion? Why of course not. Do I agree with those no religion? Why of course not. But I do believe each person has the right to have their own beliefs and thoughts. Who am I to say what is right and what is wrong. Aren’t we taught as children not to judge others?

Here’s the thing. Everyone should have the right to practice their religion, their beliefs etc. They should be able to do this safely, securely. They should do it safely and securely. I am not here to condone the extremists and crazies out there. No way. I am only saying that if people chose to be Catholic instead of Mormon – I think that is just fine and dandy.

Do I believe in God? I have had my moments, especially growing up, that I doubted there was a God. I couldn’t understand the pain, the suffering, the hurt that I and others felt if there was a God. But then I grew up. Then I begun to understand more. I began to grow my own understanding of life, God and all the things life have to offer. I once heard a man on a radio station compare having faith, if you wish, to being on a bus. If you are on a bus and there is no driver – but you have faith, well why you can’t see that driver, you have faith that he is there and the bus will not crash. If you don’t believe in God or a higher power, then who is driving that bus? That comparison made me think real hard about my own beliefs and my own faith.

Do I believe in the bible? That’s a question that is often asked all too often. And my honest answer. No. It is a book that has been touched by man and if I am true to my belief then God is the only perfect person, correct? So how can imperfect people create a book of writings that I am to follow that I have to believe is unadulterated and authentic?

Do I believe that we have to go to church or be saved to have a relationship with God? NEGATIVE. I do not have to walk in a building to talk to God. God and I, we have our own talks on our time. Nor do I have to profess my life to God in front of anyone to have a relationship with him. In the end, in my belief system, God and I will have our own conversation. You will not be there to tattle on me for not going to church etc.

The only other opinion that I can offer is this. Religion is a personal choice one has to make. My oldest daughter has made her choice to be very religious. I support her for doing so. This is not something I showed her or encouraged her to do. She made a choice as a small child to have her own relationship with God and I admire her for that choice. I am only turned off by those who tell me I have to have the same beliefs, that I am going to hell for my choices, that I am a bad person for my faith. That scares me, that scares me away from religion.

Embrace your faith and your beliefs. It’s admirable. But do not tell me I have to be the same way.

There are people out there who firmly believe that the parent should remove the child as to not disrupt everyone else.

There are people out there who firmly believe that the parent should be able to stay and not have to worry about everyone else.

Here are my thoughts.

Did you know at some point that we were children too? That our parents had to deal with our behavior (good or bad) at some point? I truly doubt any of us were perfect. In fact I know none of us were perfect. I can almost guarantee that at some point we threw a tantrum or acted out in public. Even those of us who don’t have kids were still kids at some point. I know…shocker.

I am sure you are sitting there thinking that my children are those children. The ones that just aggravate you to no end in public. But oh my friend are you wrong. My kids are not perfect and a lot of times they drive me crazy in public. They don’t scream or throw fits. They have. Yes they have. But when Brent went to work in Alaska over five years ago my mother in law enforced one thing in our family – that the kids behave in public. For various reasons she did this. One…I would be alone. All alone with three kids in tow when I go to the store or to a restaurant. The minute the I would have to chase one kid down or get onto them, two could get taken or run off. And my mother in law said that even though I have kids I should still be able to go sit down and enjoy myself in a restaurant. So my kids learned from a young age how to act in public. Do they still act out? Yes of course. Just the other day my son figured out how to slide across the floors of a grocery store. Was he harming anyone? Nope. Was it driving me crazy? Yep.

But now that I have three kids in school and am able to attend a grocery store alone things are quite different. I am now the parent without kids and watching other parents with kids in a store. I have heard kids screaming. I have seen kids crying. The parent or parents are mortified and I feel so bad for them. We cannot control the outbursts of children. We just can’t. Nor do we know their story. And to ever hear of adults judging the parents of the misbehaving children drives me crazy. You don’t know them or their story. I’ve had to go to the store with a sick kid before because I have no help and am alone. I’ve had to lay them in the cart while they cry and don’t feel well so that I can pick up medicine. They aren’t misbehaving or acting out…they just don’t feel well. And what makes me even more frustrated is the employees that complain. If you don’t want to deal with the general public, including children – well you might want to find another job.

Here’s my last bit of thought regarding this situation and it comes from my husband -

Mind your own business.

Neil Simon once said;

Don’t listen to those who say, “It’s not done that way.” Maybe it’s not, but maybe you will.

Don’t listen to those who say, “You’re taking too big a chance.” Michelangelo would have painted the Sistine floor, and it would surely be rubbed out by today.

Most importantly, don’t listen when the little voice of fear inside of you rears its ugly head and says, “They’re all smarter than you out there. They’re more talented, they’re taller, blonder, prettier, luckier and have connections…” I firmly believe that if you follow a path that interests you, not to the exclusion of love, sensitivity, and cooperation with others, but with the strength of conviction that you can move others by your own efforts, and do not make success or failure the criteria by which you live, the chances are you’ll be a person worthy of your own respect.

And really I only wish I could have said it. Especially when it comes to blogging. Why? Because really who cares? I mean really? We can all lie to ourselves and tell the world it’s because of our readers, or numbers or something else. But it’s not. It’s ourselves. We are comparing ourselves and listening to the voice of fear Neil Simon was referring to. We want to be better, smarter, richer.  And if that was the only reason you started blogging – well dammit do it. Who cares what everyone else says? Do you like the way your blog looks? Then why change it for someone else?

The fact of the matter is to truly NOT sell out you need to listen to Neil Simon or yourself. Not that voice of fear. Not the other bloggers. Just do what you want. Do what makes you feel good. Because in the end – tomorrow we could all hit delete on our blog. Make it disappear. And what we thought, what we felt, what everyone said – well it disappears too. And we move one. We live. We learn.

Don’t waste YOUR time making everyone else happy because that only means that YOU are unhappy.

I’ve heard plenty of talk from plenty of people that smoking is bad. That I smell and should stay away from them etc etc. I have no problem respecting your choice to dislike smoking. I am not going to blow my smoke in your face, not because of health issues – but I find it rude. I won’t smoke around your kids because well those are your kids. But I get a little irked by random strangers coming up to me to tell me smoking is bad. Last I checked, I knew that. I wasn’t smoking this cigarette thinking it was going to prolong my life. Am I addicted? Yes. Do I want to quit. Not yet. I’m not ready to. But there will be a day I want to and that will be the day I put them down.

There actually was a time I quit. Why did I pick them up again? Because they were there and quite frankly because I could. Stupid me. Yes.

There are two things that get me.

If I respect you as a non smoker why is it that because I have a bad habit all of a sudden it’s as if I am viral. Stay away from her, don’t want to catch the smokers disease. I know the cons of smoking. I pay out of my pocket, a pretty penny I might add, to fuel by nasty, disgusting habit, why now it OK for you to approach me or outcast me?

If I was obese would you approach me as I was eating a big mac to tell me it was bad for me?

And why is it that again as I pay for my own habit, I now have laws against my own habit? I am merely killing myself. I am not drinking and driving. I am not shooting smack. I am not shooting smack into my kids veins. I am not smuggling drugs across the border with my cartel boyfriend. And you may be the same person that is asking for an ILLEGAL drug to be legalized.

Am I missing something? Where do all these lines get drawn and what is the best lines to draw?

My friends and I have a lot of discussions about Halloween. A LOT. They are Halloween addicts and every year they full on get dressed up. I’m talking complete awesome costumes down to details, make up, hair etc. Then they attend a GIGANTIC Halloween bash in Phoenix that to enter..you have to be dressed up. I’m not the biggest fan of the holiday, but I love letting my kids dress up and go trick ‘r treating. I honestly think as we become adults or I should say parents, that some holiday’s are a lot more entertaining by watching them.

When I was a kid or even teenager, I still didn’t dress up that much. And if I did I tried to go for a unique look and not your typical look. Something different or even boring.

But the most discussed topic when it comes to Halloween is, how can it be ruined? And with talking about it so much there is one thing that can make or break a Halloween, halloween costumes.

You are probably wondering how right?

Easy.

Oh yes. The infamous slutty costumes. Want to be SpongeBob? Go slutty. Oh and slutty Minnie Mouse.

Ugh.

Check Out All The Hot Halloween Costumes For Your Family and Get All The Trendiest, Hottest and Best Halloween Beauty Products and Halloween Costume Ideas For Women.

The first question had to do with what we were doing in class. I will not bore you with the question as obviously you are not in my class. But the other two questions are quite interesting and it has been enjoyable talking amongst my classmates about it.

First thing first, we were directed to read a website about Animal Rights and Welfare. It offered a massive amount of information for the first question. Is it ethical to perform experiments on animals? And the second question is it ethical to perform experiments on humans? Of course both of these questions were worded quite differently but that is the just of what was being asked.

Believe it or not I think most of the class was answering with a resounding ‘No’ towards ethical experiments on animals. My answer was my typical wishy washy ‘Uh, well I think so BUT the only problem I have with it is when these animals are euthanized after experiments are over’. It honestly bothers me to think that these animals are treated as simple objects for the greater good. But I do realize the advances we have made because of experiments that have been done on animals. Hence my wishy washy response.

My response on whether it is ethical to perform experiments on humans was far more detailed. You see humans have the capability of voicing their thoughts, feelings and responses. I also know that when someone is plagued by horrendous diseases such a cancer, Parkinson’s, Multiple Sclerosis etc, that often times hope is lost. But if there is a trial for say a drug to see if it would reduce the effect of Parkinson’s and the person(s) agree to it, I don’t see how that is unethical. I think the only way it can be unethical is if the person is NOT consenting to the trial. Yet someone else brought up a very good point.

In the newspapers etc you will often find advertisements (if you wish) for experimental trials on age range, gender etc and you get paid for it. If a person is hard up for money and they qualify they will see that as a way to earn a little extra cash. Though, do they truly understand the risk of going forward with the experiment? Or are they merely thinking about ‘I need this money badly’?

So what are your thoughts?

A long time ago the husbands would go to work that was it. Maybe he would fix things around the house. And maybe he would mow the yard.

The roles were very strict and you didn’t really cross them. Women belonged in the house and men didn’t. Times have obviously changed dramatically as we often find men at home and women in the work place.

But now that times have changed you still run across men AND women with those old fashioned, traditional ideas. I have run across them plenty of times in my life. Being told that I should “submit” to my husband and “cater” to him. I’ve often asked Brent if he would like me to cater to him and always get a very sarcastic reply, ‘Yes cook my dinner and then give me a massage’. I know full well it is sarcastic as Brent and I have built a relationship around a partnership.

Yes I stay at home. I do cook. I do clean. I do make my children plates for dinner. I do NOT make his plate. He is a grown man and after caring for three children all day I do NOT want to care for an adult. I do make him clean up after himself and we both expect the same amount from each other. That is a partnership. We did not go into our relationship with preconceived ideas that he is the man and will beat on his chest every night after I make him dinner.

Whenever this topic is brought up to me or Brent we usually agree on our beliefs. We don’t think that their are laid out roles in our household. Nor do we believe in them. Yes I am the wife, yes he is the husband; but one is not greater than the other. Yes he makes the money and yes I stay home. But our jobs are equally just as hard. Though at times he believes dealing with the screaming, fighting, cleaning and monotonous routine of our lives is MUCH harder. At times I couldn’t imagine having to airport hop, work for 6 weeks straight and be away from my family.

We have formed this partnership together. We based it off our friendship. We work together. We love together. We make choices together. And often we do the work together. Everything is equal in our lives. We believe in that equality. I am not my husbands servant and he is not mine. Do we do things for each other? Sure. I often do make him a special meal. I often let him sleep all day. I often give him a massage. Same goes for him. It’s a give and take kind of thing.

My question is this though, does their have to be roles? Is one gender greater than the other in situations like mine? And why do people feel as though one should maybe do more than the other?

Social media is around now too. You only get 140 words on Twitter to actually say what you have to say. So that means cutting your sentences short or using “text speak”.

It’s also hard when blogging, talking on Facebook, forums or the likes to type exactly how a conversation went or what you think. So it has become easier to use “text speak” when responding etc.

There is the problem.

TEXT SPEAK.

It is the death of the English language as we know it. No longer are capital letters, punctuation marks and correct spelling a thought. When you want to get your point across you often see people typing in all capitals with no punctuation at all. Kids think it’s cool to leave messages such as, “c u l8r bff”. Or my favorite is when they omit letters, turning don’t into dnt. Really. That O was so hard to type in that sentence?

Now don’t get me wrong, I type LOL into my blog posts all the time. Or I use HaHa. It’s not proper English and I am butchering it too. It’s just much harder to emphasize the humor in my story that is coming from my mind. And all to often I laugh at things most wouldn’t find funny, so I try to emphasize my own humor.

But I try.

I try to at least take the, approximately one second, to type the letter O in the word don’t.

I get it. I get that twitter gives you 140 characters. I get that you only get a certain amount of characters in a text message. I understand that. But if you are say, leaving a comment on a blog – can you at least take the time to form a full sentence with all the vowels? It seems a bit lazy otherwise. If you are that lazy to type out the letter O, why don’t you attempt talking like that for a day. When you talk to someone you are not allowed to say the letter O at all. See how stupid you look then. OK?

Alas as we go farther and farther into the future with the ever advancing technology, I have this fear; dread. The English language will just die out. And we will soon all be talking like neanderthals.

Sigh.

Guess wll just have 2 c hw it trns out?

To this day I teach my kids these same things, but somehow society has deemed it OK to blame other people.

This talk is brought about by recent conversations with friends about how music, particularly rap music, influences others in a negative way.

The way I see it is very simple, music is an expression and just a perception. Interpretation may be different from each person to the next as we are NOT the creator of it, but it is NOT a fault.

I cannot blame country music for my drinking beer in a small town on Saturday night with my horse.

I cannot blame classic rock for my wanting to grow my hair long and play on my Les Paul custom guitar while drinking and smoking.

I cannot blame Bob Marley if I decided to smoke a bowl.

I cannot blame Tupac if I decided to pick up a gun and shoot someone.  Nor could I blame the gun.

Are people easily influenced? Maybe so, but I do have my own mind. I do make my own choices. I do know right from wrong. I have known it for the past 24 years since I decided to grab that lipstick and write on the wall.

I think it’s quite possible people are already predisposed to violence, addiction etc. So they are more susceptible to turning violent after listening to a little Rage Against the Machine. But the keyword in there – predisposed. Quite possibly these people are already ticking time bombs.

If they are children reacting to music then I must say….um Parents you are failing at your job.

And if they are suffering from a mental disorder and react well…someone wasn’t doing their job.

And if you are just your average person and you do something bad there is one simple answer…quite possibly you are just a bad person.

Seriously. Enough of the blame game. It’s time to man up.

According to this map, but it could be grossly off – we really aren’t “a ways removed from the border”.  West did go on to retract and say she did misspeak, “I did get a passing grade in Geography in high school and in college and I do obviously know that Arizona is on the border.” And of course senator Jon Kyl did write a lovely letter with a map to West.

I guess all of this illegal immigration stuff is really uncalled for considering we are a ways removed from the border. So now we can all go onto our regularly scheduled lives. No more announcements on Ecuadorean television by Hillary Clinton that Arizona is going to be sued. Jan Brewer really had no reason to even attempt writing this bill at all.The boycotts can stop, it was all just a BIG misunderstanding.

Just wanted to clarify things for you all.